my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
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