: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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