So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
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