dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
