We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
