He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Randomize
