Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Randomize
