I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
Randomize
