When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
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