hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
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