all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
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