He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
