I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this