Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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