i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
Randomize
