No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Randomize
