Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize
