I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
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