yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Randomize
