Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Randomize
