and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Randomize
