What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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