Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
i just had sex bonerless
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Randomize
