so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
MIDGETS
????
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
