what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
