So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
