so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Randomize
