Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
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its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
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Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
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