The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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