Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Randomize
