You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Randomize
