Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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