i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
