My liver just broke up with me...
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
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