Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
Randomize
