"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
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