At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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