Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Randomize
