he was CRYING into my vagina
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
a search helicopter?!
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
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