Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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