And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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