Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
farters have to be the big spoon...
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize
