Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
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It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
He turned down a handjob. A HANDJOB. I know I'm no Jessica Simpson, but...
Actually, she's fat now, so...
Fuck. I AM Jessica Simpson.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
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Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
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