Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
