i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
im holly from the hills drunk
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
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