i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
Fuck appropriateness.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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