Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize