You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
