I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
I bet he comes in French.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Randomize
