From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
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