She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Randomize